|
Women Gathering aims to encourage women to get together regularly for friendship, support and fun in order to respectfully hear each others stories.
My greatest sources of support and friendship were a small group of women bound by the fact that our children all attended the same school and we all lost our homes. We started meeting for coffee a few weeks after the fires and, six years on, we still meet regularly for lunch. We call ourselves The Singed (as in “slightly burnt”) Sisterhood. I don’t know how I would have got through the last six years without these wonderful women who have now become close friends.
Tips from a bushfire survivor, Canberra woman Liz Tilley who lost her home in Warragamba Avenue, Duffy, Canberra, in the January 2003 firestorm.
Women Gathering – a literature review, found that the primary obstacles to women forming close friendships with other women in rural areas were gossip, the lack of confidentiality, and either deliberate or accidental exclusion. Non, or limited acceptance of diversity placed a further mighty wedge between a woman and a potential friend.
Recent research confirmed that the more friends we have, the better off we are, both mentally and physically.
Everyone knows, surely, that it is better to have friends than to be friendless; being included in outings and activities is preferable to being left out; and trusting your story is safe is the only way real friendship can thrive. Women Gathering encourages women who are usually overlooked or don’t have the opportunity or means to join in community activities to be included.
Currently in the Hume region there are over 45 groups of women getting together over an activity or just a for the sake of it. These groups are facilitated or run by a local woman who just want to get women together.
The group decides what they are going to do, where and when they are going to meet, they decide on group rules and agree to meet for at least six weeks. Meeting together for at least six weeks gives the group time to get to know each other and develop friendships. At the end of six weeks the group may decide to continue meeting as a group, they may change their activity, they may change the structure of the group or decide to not to keep meeting for various reasons. But hopefully all women have had a chance to make a friend or two.
Some activities groups do are: recipe swapping, scrapbooking, mosaics, various art groups, exercise groups, tai Chi, gym group, quilting, issue based i.e. grief, learning computer skills, film group, book club.
- Respecting women’s confidences
- ‘just getting together’ because it’s important,
- Being inclusive - embracing diversity
- Ask “Who is not here?”
Bringing women together in a safe, nurturing environment and supporting them to make friendships. It doesn’t really matter what the activity is, as long as it gives women the opportunity to get to know one another.
- Small groups with a focus or an activity are the most successful. It appears that women need a focus for their meeting, a craft, guest speaker or new skill, before they come along and get the friendship juices flowing.
- Relaxation and talking occurr over a structured or semi-structured activity. Art or craft work well as women’s hands can be working and the activity is the focus, but talking and listening takes place and this is when women get to know each other and share together.
- Women enjoy being informed, sharing stories so having a speaker to stimulate discussion and new ideas also works well.
- Meeting together regularly for a minimum of 6 weeks is essential to building trust and sharing time together thus encouraging friendships through regular contact.
- Women need to own the group, so they need to decide on what they want to do and decide the best times, days, venue etc.
- Overcoming obstacles, i.e. transport, transport costs, childcare and other caring responsibilities, fear of unknown costs involved.
- One final piece of advice – always supply food! All women love to be fed.
- Get to know the women in your community
- Invite a woman who wouldn’t normally attend to the next community event you attend.
- Organise a get together with other women.
- Attend a Women Gathering workshop.
- Start “a group” for women in your community to attend. You may be eligible for a small grant to get started.
- Identify women in your community who may like to become a woman gathering facilitator. Provide her with encouragement and support to do this.
- Organise a Women Gathering Workshop in your community.
|
